Saturday, July 07, 2007

People From ALL Walks of Life <--- I'm being nice

Work work work.

From Monday til today (Saturday)... Tomorrow was supposed to be my off-day, but Navroz called Friday night (last night) while i was having dinner with Sherm, Shai, Morgz and Kev, asking if i could work Sunday. At first i said "I really can't, cos i have a party on Saturday night, and we'll be drinking, i'm afraid i won't be able to wake up."

Yes, i'm too honest with people, but that's the truth. So Navroz asked if i'd prefer Southbank or KG. I say KG, he asks if 2pm is ok. I think about it... I hate washing up and doing the closes, but i say yes anyway. The party is actually Shai's long overdue house warming, which is tonight, and i decided not to go, so Morg decided not to go either, but anyway, i'm here blogging, so obviously i'm too tired to go.

Then today, at work (Southbank), he calls to ask if i can come in earlier tomorrow... Gosh... "what do you want from me?" <--- i was just thinking that, didn't say it. He asked for me at 11am at first, then i negotiated to 12pm, we reached an agreement, but he says that if possible, he'd like me to come in at 11.30am... So i guess that means 11.30am then... Damn. I haven't been able to sleep in since i got better... aside from the GC trip where i slept at least til 10am everyday... but still...

Anyway, the reason i'm so tired is cos today's lunch rush at Southbank was MAD!! Crazy!! Nuts!! Need i say more? Of the 6 hours, 5 were considered "rush hours". I was in charge of meats... meaning i'm the first person to serve---start the bread and cheese and meats. Basically i greet the customer and start the "production line". The convo would sound something like this:

Me: Hi, what can i get for you today?
Customer: Could i get meatballs please?
Me: Sure. A six inch or foot long?
Customer: Err... a six inch thanks.
Me: Yup (while i take the bread out, cut it, then put the meatballs on). Any cheese? Would you like it toasted?
Customer: Yes, cheese please.
Me: Is this toasted today? (Customer's never answer 2 questions. Their brains can't handle it. It's annoying.)
Customer: Sorry?
Me: Do you want this toasted? (I'm sure it has something to do with the way aussies pronounce "toasted". Sometimes i have to say it 3 times before they get what i'm saying.)
Customer: Oh, yes please. And could i get capsicum, onion...
Me: (Cutting him/her off) Er... They'll do the salads for you (i point to my fellow "sandwich artists").
Customer: Oh.

Anyway, today was amazingly busy. Mainly cos it's at Southbank, the strategic location where people go on weekends (today is Saturday) to walk around, hang out at the beach, go on dates, have family outings, browse the Saturday market, etc.

Let me paint you a picture: Imagine a long queue of at least, at LEAST 10 people, constantly standing there, waiting to be served, and every time you manage to serve as many as possible and get the numbers down, they keep coming, and the line is either constant, or constantly getting longer. It's okay for me, cos i enjoy serving, rather than cleaning (partly why i always ask for day shifts), and i'm fast with the meats. Linda, Ben and Ryan told me to slow down at least 3 times today and Ryan, a fifteen-year-old, who smokes, and slacks off a lot, told me to "work like him". Made me laugh, he's a nice kid, mom died, dropped out of high school, calls his stepmother the C word and has a foul mouth, but he's funny and just needs a bit of direction. Anyway, like i said, today's so called "lunch rush" lasted 5 friggin hours... normally it only lasts 2 and a half or 3 hours. And boy did i get customers from "all walks of life"... In other words, idiots, bitches and condescending bastards. Excuse my french, but after serving for so long, people get on your nerves. Especially the weird, picky, dumb ones, that you just wanna jump over the counter and beat til they scream "sorry" or til their heads explode. Ok, i might be over doing it a little. Basically you just wanna slap them. But then there are some funny ones and definitely some lovely customers that fully appreciate our efforts of being as efficient and nice to them as possible... But others just don't understand the "situation".

Then you get some people that can't speak English or prefer not to speak English and choose to use sign language and you have to use sign language too. Gosh... I will come off a bit racist saying this, but it's true, and i'm sorry if this puts anyone off... but, Chinese people, i can't stand serving. Give you examples later.

I've selected some ehemmm... "memorable" exchanges, they're only excerpts and placed in no particular order, enjoy!!

C = Customer and J = me, Jamie, and their race, yes, i'm being racist again, call it whatever you want, the race of the customer will be in front of the "C".

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J: Would you like that on a foot long or a six inch?
Indian C: Err... a long foot. Long foot.
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J: Hi, what can i get for you today?
Aussie C: Could i get a 3 inch please?
J (thinking): What the...??? Haha.... oh.... she means a 6 inch... gosh.... (then i cut whatever she wanted in half, looked at her facial expression, then continued with the meets, she didn't protest, so i assumed i was correct...)
--------------------
J: What would you like?
Aussie C: I'd like a cheese steak on a 4 inch please, thanks.
J (thinking): Oh my God... I hope she means a 6 inch...

She did mean a 6 inch.
--------------------
J: What can i get for you today?
C: Could i get a 6-inch-foot-long.
J: Sorry?
C: A 6-inch-foot-long.
J: Err... Did you want a 6 inch or a foot long? (Sign language came into play here, gesturing with both my hands)
--------------------
male aussie C: Cheddar please.
J: We're out of Cheddar, sorry. Swiss or Old English?
male aussie C: Cheddar.
J: Sir, we don't have Cheddar. Would you like Swiss or Old English?
--------------------
J: Salads?
C: Err... Yes. Thanks.
J: Err... What salads?
C: Oh... sorry... Lettuce, onion, capsicum...
--------------------
J: Any sauce on this?
C: Yes, thanks.
Waiting....
J: Er... what sauce?
C: Oh... (then looks at the sauces)
Waiting....
C: Honey Mustard thanks.
--------------------
J: Any sauce?
Indian C in a thick Indian accent: A thousand islands sauce, please.
--------------------
J: We're out of that sorry. We only have white bread left.
male aussie C: That (pointing to the top of the shelf) doesn't look like white.
J: It's fresh out of the oven and it's too hot. So we can't use that. Sorry. (Condescending little piece of....)
--------------------
aussie mom: Could you cut that in 3 please? (referring to the foot long sub)
J: Sure... (as i'm cutting it)
aussie mom: Yeah, just cut that part half (referring to one of the two halves)
I cut it.
aussie mom: That's not half, but nevermind. (looks pissed)
J: Sorry. (bitter hag!!)
--------------------
J: (talking to Linda, my co-worker) That's a fillet, foot long. (She nods as...)
fat aussie woman: With honey mustard sauce.
J: (I look at her after i'm done talking).
fat aussie woman: Did you hear that? (with one hand cupped over her ear and her head leant forward in a condescending manner)
J: Yes, honey mustard, got it. (i'm Asian, not deaf, bitch.)
-------------------
J: Hi, what would you like today?
aussie man: Meatballs please.
J: We're out of meatballs, sorry.
He just walks off as i'm thinking "WHAT???"
-------------------
Some funny things are when some people read "capsicum" as capsicun, with an "N". And they don't know it's wrong. You'd be surprised how many... I'd say at least half of the people that come in say "capsicuN".

I also love listening to the customers struggle when they try to order the chipotle southwest cheese steak. They almost always read chipotle wrong. It's supposed to be read SHE-POT-TLE. But we've had loads of people read it as CHEE-POL-TEEEE or CHAI-PO-TAY.
-------------------
Then there are times when i get racist people, racist as in they've never seen an Asian, especially Chinese/Korean/Japanese-looking ones that speak proper English. How do i tell? Just the look on their faces when i greet them. It's priceless. And there are soooooooo many.
-------------------
Back to why i don't like serving Asians, yes, i realise i'm being a hypocrite, but everyone's a little bit hypocritical and everyone's a little bit racist.

There've been so many "cases" where i've had to gesture a foot long or a six inch with my hands further apart (foot long sub), then closer (six inch). And the Chinese girls always annoy me cos they can never, and i mean, NEVER, make up their minds... plus they either refuse to or don't know how to speak English, resorting to pointing their way through the "production line". This happens both at Southbank and KG. They would pick meat to go with their bread, then decide on some other meat after you've put it in the microwave. OR they'll tell you they want the bread toasted right before you've finished salads and have started wrapping the sub. ARGGhhhhh..... And they'd point their way through the salads section while making this "manja" sound, which sounds like "mmmm...." or some sound they make while pouting their lips to their boyfriends, getting them to buy stuff for them. It's soooooo annoying. And when you put your hand in the wrong choice of salads (cos their pointing through glass, and it's hard to tell which salads they actually want), they make a high-pitched sound of "mmm!!" like a child makes when his/her mom gives her a smack on the butt. Gosh. Makes me wanna choke. I'm here to make your sandwich, not to get goosebumps from the sounds you make.
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Can't think of anymore at the moment.
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Sorry, just had to vent after today. I am really sorry if i've offended anyone. If you had a laugh, then that's good. That's all it's meant to be.


Thanks for reading and thanks for caring!

1 Comments:

Blogger Shannon Ng said...

Why did I miss this post??it's fooking hilarious!!

I remembered my experience at Indroopily's(did I spell it right?) Subway with Adrian ordering a footlong meatball sub.

Me: Hi, I'll get a foot long meatball sub please?
Worker: Would you like your meatball toasted.
Me & Adrian: ~laughes like mad~
Me(gasping for air resolves to nodding to say yes.)

4:32 AM  

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